Skip to main content

THE SEASON OF LOVE: WHAT PERSONS WITH DIFFERENCES WANT YOU TO KNOW!

 

It’s the season of love. 

Everyone knows that I am a mushy person, and I love love!

I love romantic things. Unfortunately, I’m single. But I’ll show love to myself. 

Like Joan in girlfriends said,” I will embrace my singlehood.”

It’s Valentine’s day! Of course, people treat the day as a day focused on romantic love alone, but generally, it’s a day to show love to everyone!

Gone are the days when people with disabilities weren’t allowed to mingle with other members of society. 

People with differences find love. They have children and live very fulfilled lives. 

Love is not always easy- it comes with problems (I would know). If you’re friends with or dating a person with a disability or a disorder, there are things that you need to know. 

Persons with disabilities will want you to know these three things;

Have Patience with me

Patience is needed daily, with yourself, with your parents, and most importantly, with partners. Caring for persons with differences can be overwhelming sometimes, but what in the world isn’t? 

These people want you to love them and be patient with them. It may take time for milestones to be achieved; while you wait on the sun to shine on you, do not give up. No one likes for someone to abandon them. So please understand there will be bad days, and they want you to love them despite them.

      Don’t be ashamed of me. 

The crazy thing about society is that they will always place standards on you. People that don’t know you will be telling you how to live your life, dictating what you wear, what to say, and who you date. 

Unfortunately, not many people are open to persons with differences, but that should not be your problem; if they have a problem accepting, tell them to fix up. You continue to show your partner love within and outside your home. Introduce them to friends. It may be difficult, but I realize that with love, anything is possible. 

Communicate with me!

Communication is needed every day, especially when it comes to relationships. No one is a mind reader and cannot fully know what you are thinking. Speak up when you have something bothering you. Some people may not understand your facial expressions, so don’t be vague and communicate with them about your challenges. 

Please speak up.

Most importantly, be understanding. If you’re dating someone with a physical challenge, understand that you may need help to achieve some things or to do daily things. The world hardly ever has disabled people in mind, and that can make life unnecessarily difficult. Please make them feel loved.


To my little brother and others living with a neurodevelopmental disorder or disability, I wish you a beautiful love story with a gentle, patient, and understanding partner who is always rooting for your success. 

Happy Valentine’s day. 

 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Change

HOW I DEALT WITH THE NEWS. Hiiiiiii. Let me just say my awesome friends pushed me to doing this and I love them❤️ So I have been so fortunate to know the word “Autism and everything it entails. I have a brother of 17 years who is autistic and if you knew me well, you would know I mention Tobi like a million times a day, when referring to anything. He's just in my mind everytime, gosh. Is it weird that I don’t remember my childhood? Maybe, But I think it’s so weird that I don’t understand how it happened, why it keeps happening to children, but I can tell that they are beautiful in every way and when my brother became autistic, was he meant to be this or was cursed? As a Nigerian, you question things like this and search for spiritual help.  I never knew of the situation till I was 14. When I was younger, I was ignorant. I didn’t know what was wrong with my brother. I was even too self-absorbed at that age or just busy looking for trouble. I didn’t know why he didn’t speak or w...
31 comments
Read more

A PERSONAL STORY ON CEREBRAL PALSY: CAN REALLY GOD TAKE AWAY DISABILITIES?

Did I always know better? No. So, I will tell you something that happened in Secondary School ten years ago. There was this girl that had Cerebral Palsy . But I didn’t know that was it. I always thought that she had a curse or possession.  Image from Very Well Health site  I did not even know about Cerebral Palsy until I got out of high school. I randomly remembered her last year and felt so terrible. This girl was subjected to mockery, ridicule, and so much stress in a boarding school by her teachers, mates, and seniors. I couldn’t even possibly imagine how she felt. She had to make it to class every day without support and learn like others. There was no form of special education in the school.  See Last Month's post: Reservations from a love struck neurotypical sibling   I cannot blame her parents, even if it’s questioning to let your child come to that kind of environment. They may not have known about her problem. If they weren't aware she was differ...
1 comment
Read more

Helllooooooo!

PARENTS Last time I wrote about how I handled the news of my brother being on the spectrum, possibly telling the other siblings who have special siblings that everything will be okay if they just understand their siblings and try their best to create time for them and appreciate their existence. So today is for the parents and also siblings though. I’m not a parent but I’m at that age to learn things, to accept them. I can tell that I’m probably going to be an extra and dramatic mother🤷 If you have a parent in your life or a parental figure in your life that actually loves you and does everything to make you happy, you’re so lucky. Trust me that they might not show you love the way you want it, but they do. I follow this Instagram platform for Autism parents and the way they talk about them is amazing. There are like super heroes. You can imagine how hard parenting is. How you have to sacrifice your own need for a person. I don’t know how I would handle it but parenthood is someth...
11 comments
Read more